The following articles were authored by tdeloughry

Welcome Pastor Brian and Barbara Bruce

I am pleased to introduce you to two colleagues who will be regular contributors on the topic of Never Too Old – and who share the leadership of the Northeast Forum on Spirituality and Aging (NEFOSA).

I hope you’ll find them to be as helpful and inspiring as I do.

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Barbara Bruce has been a friend and mentor for nearly 15 years.  She is an educator and author of ten books who has a passion for teaching about both the learning brain and a holistic approach to successful aging.  She and I are both associate directors of NEFOSA. 

“I believe  that the mind, body, and spirit are intertwined to make us who we are as  individuals,” says Barbara. “To that end, I consider all three in my presentations, books and  articles.”  Check out her website at

Read why Barbara thinks that “forgiving and forgetting are not the same thing” in Forgiveness, – posted in our menu under both Never Too Old  and the Satisfaction Skills.

Rev. Brian McCaffrey

Rev. Brian McCaffrey has been a Lutheran Pastor for 26 years and is currently Chaplain at LutheranCare in Clinton, NY. He serves as the chair of the Northeast Forum on Spirituality & Aging  which is a network of  various denominations  and individuals who believe that aging nudges us toward the  spiritual growth.

“I make a direct correlation between creativity and spiritual growth.” says Brian. ” I believe we enter into a partnership with Life / the Divine when we take what Life hands to us and we create something out of it.  In the process we get transformed.”

Brian will be contributing original articles, as well as reviews of resources he has found on the Internet, in bookstores and elsewhere.

Read Brian’s article on The Poetics of Aging, posted under Never Too Old, and tell us what you think.

Forgiveness by Barbara Bruce

Research is being conducted in laboratories around the world on the physical and mental aspects of forgiveness and its effect on health and longevity. These studies give evidence to the fact that our conscious act of forgiveness increases self-esteem, lessens anxiety and anger, lowers heart rate, reduces blood pressure and the best part is there is no prescription involved. Learning to forgive is clearly associated with a variety of health issues. By reducing negative energy and incorporating a forgiving attitude, you can enlarge the positive aspects of mental and physical health.

So, you may query – just what is forgiveness and how can I get some? Forgiveness is simple but never easy. It is truly a change of mind and heart. It is relatively easy to verbalize, “I forgive him”, but that is only half of the process. The second half is much more difficult, and yet it is the key factor. You must convince yourself that whatever this person has done to you is over – it is done. You cannot change the person. You cannot change history, there is no magic that will undo and recover what has happened. Let it go! Get on with your life.  I said it wasn’t easy. Continue reading Forgiveness by Barbara Bruce

The Poetics of Aging by Pastor Brian

The Poetics of Aging

The traditional view of aging thinks of it in terms of work: measured by whether work is present or absent.

I prefer instead to think of aging in terms of music.  Life has four ages, stages, or movements, just as a symphony does.

So, of course, aging as music, aging as poetics, is long overdue for discussion– Dick Bolles

The Poetics of Aging  – That was the heading in an e-mail I received.  It caught my eye

It turned out to be the name of a conference: Poetics Of Aging Conference: A Grassroots Gathering To Celebrate Eldership And Value Aging As The Basis For Depth And Wisdom (November 16 – 19, 2011, San Francisco, CA  —

It may seem an obvious insight that we all age, but there is a strong cultural bias against aging.  I am delighted whenever I encounter another positive perspective on the second half of life.  “The conference mission is to counter the mainstream understanding of aging as decline and/or disease with a more expansive, humanistic, and creative – that is poetic – vision and approach.  Together we shall create a climate where people share their awareness and creative expressions, while providing room for self-study and discovery.” The website led me to a fascinating paper by Dr. Nader Robert Shabahangi the founder of the AgeSong Institute ( — One of the many collaborators of the Poetics of Aging Conference) Continue reading The Poetics of Aging by Pastor Brian

Planning for the End of Life (video)

This three minute video descrbes why all adults should have a health care agent.

It is tells the true story of the choices that my wife, Kathy, faced before her mother died from Alzheimer’s Disease.


This video was made possible, in part, by grants from the Community Health Foundation of Western and Central New York and the Niagara County Office for the Aging. (And thanks to Jesse for his cameo appearance as “the father.”)

To give your loved ones peace of mind, instead of tough choices, please visit where you will find many helpful resources.

Please post your comments and suggestions.

We Never Outgrow the Need for Love (video)

This 90 second video by Dr Verna Carson, author of Spritual Caregiving, explains how peace of mind can always grow.
What do you think?

Create an Action Plan

It’s easy to create an Action Plan to help you solve any “piece” of your Wellness Puzzle whether you’re facing a medical, emotional or spiritual problem.

All you need to do remember the “poem for any problem”, as illustrated above. Continue reading Create an Action Plan

Wellness is more than what medicine can measure (video)

The following video clip  explain one of the  major themes of the Being Your Best (BYB) progam
For more details, please review the BYB stories by visiting and going to the “Read” page where you’ll find:

Love is a verb…

Commit commandments to lifeOn a recent Saturday(March 3, 2012) I took advantage of the opportunity to attend Tom’s program on managing stress.  As the presentations and the discussions progressed, the greatest commandment (Loving God with all your heart, soul & mind, and loving your neighbor as yourself) became a topic we focused on as part of the concept of managing stress in your life.  Through this discussion I shared that we need to realize that Love is in fact a verb.  Although one might feel love as well, one may express that love as well.  Therein lies the verb.

We follow the greatest commandment by dropping a note of support or grief to a friend or acquaintance, letting someone ahead of you in the grocery store who may only have one or two items, by praying for someone you know is in crisis or Continue reading Love is a verb…

Your Wellness Partner?

Over 90% of those attending the seminar said they would discuss their progress with a wellness partner at least once a week.  How is that going so far?

How anyone tried asking their parents or children to be their partner?

The more partners you have, the better!